Barriers to Happiness
It's been an interesting few weeks for me, I've had visits from clients past and lots of new faces through the door too! I often find when I'm doing my healing work that I come across 'themes' - I'll get visits from clients all needing to unlock the same issue, and in working with these lovely people and our guides I'll get an opportunity to really expand my knowledge and experience in an area.
Well, this week has been polarised for me by a visit from a client I haven't seen for a year. When she came to me first she was exhausted, having given away all of her energy to all the people around her; taking on their worries and woes and putting herself to the bottom of the pile. Seeing her again today, she's had a complete transformation - her energy is higher and stronger, her eyes shine brighter, she was filled with hope for the future and her messages from her Guides and Helpers was a resounding pat on the back! And yet, she still had to be reminded in her reading of certain important points to take on to her future journey with her. And sitting here tonight, watching the birds in my garden, I started to think how important these points are for us all.....so here they are:
1) If you never prioritise yourself, no one else will either.
I think most of us understand on some level that what you send out into the universe you get back. Well, if you always do everything for everyone else and their needs, and NEVER think about what you want or need, this behaviour will become expected of you, and people will start to take you for granted. We've all been there, offering to help a friend who is struggling even though your 'to do' list is a mile long, you think you might be coming down with something and, frankly, you're exhausted.......and that's ok - as long as it's once in a while and not all the time. Try and spend some time focusing on what you want - if you were without restriction of time and energy today what would you do for yourself?
2) It's ok to say no (and sometimes very necessary)
If you do nothing else this week, spend a bit of time focusing on your Solar Plexus chakra, the energy centre just above your tummy button - the source of instinct. And listen to how you FEEL. In a world where we are conditioned to focus on logic, using the brain to make decisions, try being guided by how situations make you feel instead. And if you find that you don't want to do something give yourself permission to say no. It doesn't matter if you feel guilty, if you feel like you should do something, if you've already bought the tickets or said yes.....if you don't feel like it's right for you, or something you don't want to get involved in....allow yourself to say no. It's simple - and life changing.
3) Sometimes you have to find your voice
Not only to say no when you need to - but also to let people know when you've taken something on for them, or something you offered to do wasn't the easiest. We live in a world where the majority of people are in a lovely little bubble of self - their needs, their problems, their energy, so even if they don't seem to take it on board it's part of your journey of stepping into your power to at least acknowledge it: 'Barbara, I did that report you wanted, but the information wasn't easy to find so I'm now behind on my work', 'Paula it really was fine to have your kids for you today, but I'm behind with my stuff now so I haven't got time for a cup of tea'.
4) It's no one else's job to make you happy
NEWSFLASH!! If you put your hopes and dreams for happiness in the hands of someone else expect a lifetime of disappointment! We all do this to some extent: the time you really wanted to visit the beach but no one else did, so you stayed home, the film you really want to see at the cinema but you can't find anyone else to go with. How about not letting these small barriers stop you from doing what makes you tick? Why can't you go and see that film by yourself? Or do what I did recently, where I just put on facebook that one of my favourite bands were playing locally (fully expecting to end up going alone) and ending up going with an acquaintance - who is now a friend!
If something is making you unhappy, or there is something you want to do to make you happy, the only person who will be motivated by this is you. It's your need, so it's your energy and effort that has to make it happen. I've seen so many people complaining about their partners that they want something to happen - well if you want it YOU grab it, don't put the responsibility (and the blame) on someone else. I know so many people waiting for their partner to realise they really want to be booked to go to XX or that they need XX - why not do it for yourself???
Will Smith sums up my views on relationships perfectly here: http://hauteliving.com/2018/02/will-smith-jada-pinkett-smith/651889/
5) Bucket lists are not for when you retire
I love a good guilt trip! On our retreats, one of my favourite sections is when Aly starts breaking down the barriers people have set for themselves about why they can't do the things they want. So often people have built a wall of restriction, of reasons why they can't do or have what they wish for, they're convinced it won't happen for them - but when they have to say their reasons out loud Aly helps them realise that these are easily overcome, and sometimes complete works of fiction - worries about what 'could' happen but hasn't actually happened yet, the human condition of 'I'll wait until XX is done, and XX is paid off' and then I'll do something I've always wanted to do.
The time is now. Book that massage for yourself, start paying for that holiday of a lifetime, treat yourself to an amazing weekend retreat with us.....Carpe Diem - seize the day!!!!